This is going to be a braggy post. I’m feeling good, not Good Girl good, just REAL good! So get ready! I’ve had more vegetables in the past 6 days than I did for the entire Halloween to New Year’s stretch! I am in rare form!
E and I have always loved the movie Dumb and Dumber (well, maybe we don’t anymore, it’s been a while since we’ve had a viewing). Regardless, we’re pretty sure you can use a Dumb and Dumber quote to sum up just about any basic life scenario. Remember when Lloyd and Harry arrive in Aspen, shivering and with snot frozen to their faces? Yes, that’s right….they say “we’re there!” And that’s how I feel today! I want to shout from the roof tops “We’re There!”
As I made dinner tonight, I thought “I’m getting this.” And I remembered that many times over the past 10 years or so that I’ve been pursuing healthier eating this thought has come to me. Good Girl gets down about this. She thinks that because someday I will be making even better food and then think “I’m getting this!” it negates the positive of this current moment of “getting it!” Did that make any sense? No, well try where I went next! I realized that there have been many moments in my life where I have learned a new skill and thought “I’m getting this.” In fact, you might venture to say that I’m ALWAYS getting it! Or at least frequently in my life, I’m getting it! What a lovely thought! When you put it that way, life is pretty damn good!
So, as you may have guessed, we are working on what some call New Year’s resolutions around here. Only we are NOT calling them resolutions and there are no hard and fast rules. This current diet overhaul is not under Good Girl’s supervision. Just the real me and my family trying to find some middle ground so we can all be a bit healthier and feel better. And for the first time in many years, my diet overhaul doesn’t have much to do with losing weight. Another reason, I think it’s working so well, I might add. While I surely wouldn’t cry if I lost a few pounds, that is not my main reason (or even close) for making some changes. Mostly, I just want to feel better! And I want my family to feel better! So we are eating lots of veggies. And a lot less sugar, dairy and bread. Nothing is off-limits. (So when those delightful sea-salted caramels arrived (thank you MP!) I didn’t freak out! And I mean really, what is better than a glass of red and a salted caramel?) It’s more about adding in things I want to eat more of, rather than limiting myself. And guess what, when you are full of quinoa, sautéed veggies and fried eggs, you just don’t feel the need to reach for that chocolate (okay, for reals, maybe you just eat ONE piece, rather than the whole box!).
My diet changes have led to a few others that make me want to climb a mountain and sing like Maria too! Years ago, when we were the new parents to just one little munchkin, we had some friends I really admired. They were telling us about how their daughter was an early riser. Each morning, when she stirred, the two of them would look at each other and decide in that moment who would get up with her. I was amazed at this. Back then, Good Girl was fully in charge of my mothering and my marriage. I would rant and rave at Eric about the plight of motherhood. I would carry tallies in my heads of which one of us had done more “work” and which one deserved a break. I was always arguing my case to him. I literally could not imagine just having a simple, honest conversation about who was the more logical parent to get up with the child IN THAT MOMENT. But when our friends told us this, I knew I wanted to strive for that. I knew that was loving. I knew that was a team. And I knew E and I had it in us! And to be fair, E always had it in him. It was me and Good Girl who needed some help.
Flash forward to this week. E had some time off work. When we started making plans for how to spend it we both discovered that we had each planned to give the other a whole kid-free day. Sweet, right? And so, I’m feeling good. This is not Good Girl’s style. She would have been building her case for why SHE deserved a kid-free day. (And maybe would have wasted one whole day of the vacation stewing). Instead, things are different around here.
And it’s nice.
Sometimes one of us is literally so tired he/she is falling asleep. The other steps in. There is no tally. There is no “you shouldn’t have done x, y or z then you wouldn’t be so tired.” Sometimes, I’m at my breaking point (the verge of saying horrible things to little people) and E just steps in and takes them for a bike ride. Or E wants to check out a football game so I do bath, even though it’s not “my night.” And if he is home early enough, he often takes the girls outside while I prep dinner.
Is parenting hard? Yes. But I was making it so much harder with my rules, tallies, and 10 point treatises on how much more I deserved because I am the mother. It is so refreshing to just take each moment as it comes and KNOW we’ve got each other’s backs. And so, in another way, I feel that “we’re there!”
There you have it, life IS pretty damn good! I think I’ll go have a caramel!